Tuesday, January 06, 2009

I'm a Christmas Tree - get me outa here.

A Nordmann fir speaks:

'Not so pretty now am I? Lights out, stripped of all my twinkling finery; a dried husk of a thing. My once plump needles loosen and fall to the floor. So unwanted and unloved am I that tomorrow I'll get my ass hauled down the garden to feel the lick of flames. In 15 minutes consigned to memory. Ah, a Christmas tree's life is a short but merry one. One moment blown by the winds of Wales, then bought in, bedecked and worshipped by firelight. (My word, I was beautiful once.) But come twelfth night....cast out without so much as a word of thanks. Shudder. No one warned me it would end this way. Cards have gone too - but I notice the bunch of mistletoe has somehow escaped attention tacked up there on a beam amongst the cobwebs and the decoy duck collection. Will it still be there come July? Perhaps. Probably. But then I believe there is a superstition which says it should remain from one year's end to the next. Useful thing superstition, especially if good housekeeping is not one's forte. (Naming no names of course - but it would be the same person who left a frieze of santa's sleigh up in their children's bedroom for a mere 3 years. The excuse of the stopped clock being right twice a day is no good either.)

So that's it from me and for Christmas 2008. The baubles have gone back into the loft and I await my fate. Long live 2009.'

Now I feel mean - condemning a once beautiful thing to the fire. It's like making old teddies live in a box in the cellar and feeling reproached on catching their starey glassy eyes while having a tidy up.

Stop. No, No. No. Dead tree. New year. Time to move on. Christmas and New Year hype over and done with. Ditto Sales and 'Holiday' menus. It must almost be safe to venture out again. I'm putting my head up over the parapet (and that's a head sensibly be-hatted as it's so damned cold in these parts*) to see if the world has moved on. Here's hoping that whatever remains of the great British High Street is looking to the future because I certainly am.

* Haven't seen temperatures above zero for a week now; we reached -9C last night. Cold. Damned cold indeed.


Pam said...

I felt sad about mine too till I realized how prickly it had become. After it stabbed me several times I lost all my nostalgia and dragged the bugger out to the curb for the yard waste pick-up.

kissa said...

Our tree is also down and out- well lying in the garage awaiting collection on Friday to be recycled and onto a farmer's field as compost eventually. I have been wondering if this is a better fate than cremation. They have had their moments of glory and as all things in life it has to end. Enough ramblings HAPPY NEW YEAR and yes it is damm cold just now even in Cornwall it was -7 as we were coming home from Truro at 8.30last evening.

ChrisH said...

I'm so sorry I've missed so many posts - I didn't realise. Still, the good thing is I've had a very enjoyable catch-up. Your blog always looks so artistic and beautiful too. Happy New Year to you too, dear heart, and here's to our next trip to Aber!

elizabethm said...

I quite like the taking down and putting things back straight again stage. Mind you our tiny little Christmas tree hasnt quite gone outside yet, mainly because it is so so cold!